PS Magazine - TB 43-PS-607
PS, The Preventative Maintenance Monthly
ISSUE 607
JUNE 2003
we’ve stopped
the martians
here on earth.
good question,
general jones.
that’s
why
we asked here
today the only
man who has
actually
been
to mars.
this is
master
sergeant
half-mast.
he is going
to brief us
on the
planet
mars…
“…and how we
need to prepare
our soldiers
and equipment
for the hard-
ships ahead.”
…are we prepared
to fight in a martian
environment?
now, we
must take
the war
to mars…
or they’ll
be
back!
have you
really
been to mars,
sergeant?
I spent two weeks
last summer on
mars. I came back
with quite a tan.
unbelievable.
but, anyway,…
most
of mars is
desert.
lots of moving
sands and rocky
flats. but, I was
surprised to find
water
on mars.
“it pools up in mud
areas and swamps.
but our soldiers
will mostly be
fighting in deserts.”
“contrary to popular
belief, mars is not
always cold. they’ve
been fooling our
climatologists for
years
with a tem-
perature masking
device. mars is
very
hot in the summer.
our soldiers will
feel extreme heat
and be blasted by
dust and sand.”
“although it’s warm in
the winter, nights,
winter and summer,
can be
very cold.
we need to prepare
for
extreme
temp
changes.”
not
really,
sir.
I’d for-
gotten
my
sun
screen.
yes, sir. I was part
of a top-secret
space exploration
project.
R
ecently discovered
documents in a broom
closet in the pentagon
have revealed the truth.
the invasion was
real.
here is the true story…
we all agree
on that, general
smith… but…
PS 607
JUNE 03
29
607. 28-29 (C)
4/24/03
5:53 PM
Page 1
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